Sitting in my backyard on a warm summer afternoon, staring out at the bird feeders in our garden as an array of colorful birds arrive to feed, I begin to wonder about life—and the simplicity of it. Taking a deep breath in, exhaling slowly, I watch as the birds effortlessly fly in, grabbing a few seeds and flying back out again.
Why doesn’t my life feel this simple? Here I am again, reflecting on the same questions with my journal wide open, a blank page staring at me, waiting for me to write on it. But the words just aren’t coming. They feel jumbled in my mind and make zero sense. I can’t even form a thought to write.
This seems to be the state I’m in as I wonder, once again, who I am and where I’m going in my life. I’ve just hit the 60s mark, and I still feel an inner yearning to chase childhood dreams that feel like they belong to another person.
I sit there staring at the page, then look up at the birds and begin to notice the richness of their colors reflected by the sunlight. My eyes suddenly shift to the left, and there’s a sunflower growing. Where did that come from? I wonder. I notice how perky it is and realize that it’s facing the sun.
So I turn around, putting my sunglasses on so I can check the direction of the sunlight. I notice that the moon is also visible in the sky. I’m suddenly taken back to a similar journey in my life twenty years ago—a time when I felt lost and confused, a time when many life transitions were hitting me at once, a time when I reconnected with my passion for journal writing and rediscovered my affinity with the moon.
During that period of life, in my search for light, for answers that just weren’t coming, I sat in my living room in total darkness, staring out a big bay window until my eyes connected with the sight of our lunar goddess. I found her light mesmerizing, and I felt myself becoming one with her. I retreated to that living room space night after night, sitting in my favorite chair, watching her many glorious phases, and noticing the shifts of transition within myself.
My original body of work, Journaling by the Moonlight, was born out of that period of darkness in my life, a time when I just didn’t know if I was coming or going. All I knew was I was stuck, and I didn’t know how to move forward. And yet I had an inner yearning to chase a creative dream that I couldn’t quite articulate.
That moment came to me in total darkness, and this moment comes to me as the full moon rises in the sky during daylight, yet they both feel the same. One arrived on the front doorstep of midlife (just shy of turning forty), and this one came to the backdoor of midlife (pushing past my fifties). Their commonality is their timing, arriving in a period of great transition while a hunger begins to swirl within me, a craving for the next evolution of my creative calling.
It is moments like this when some may claim they’re having a midlife crisis. I prefer to call it a midlife opportunity. Whether it’s arriving on the front end of midlife or the back end, it feels similar.
Like the moon, we all go through phases in our lives. We have ups and downs; we go forward and back—and sometimes we seem to circle back around. We may hide behind the clouds or peek from beneath the clouds. But eventually, with the right kind of support and a strong sense of self-confidence, we get to a point where we can beam with full light.
As we move toward another full moon phase, this one wrapped up in a powerful lunar eclipse, I invite you into pondering your own incredible journey, honoring whatever point of transition you may be in. What creative dream still calls your name? What inner yearning still tugs on your creative soul?
Give yourself permission to be led into the questions – and see where they take you!
About Tina Games
